Top 10 Things Only Mothers Do
1. Buy a whole new wardrobe for your kid even though you have only one pair of jeans that fits you and it's the maternity kind.
2. Sleep on the floor next to the crib with your hand permanently stuck between the railings.
3. Change diaper mid-air, one handed in the middle of Manhattan. Oh yea ... it's the one right after your kid discovered plums.
4. Smell your kid's ass in public or casually stick your fingers inside the diaper for the chocolate bunny covered surprise.
5. Get a second job just so that your kid can go to "that" school and keep his dream alive.
6. Buy everything organic and grow your own garden just so that they eat the best. Meanwhile, never think twice about making ramen noodles for yourself (again).
7. Send little "Fluffy" to the pound, because he "looked wrong" at the baby.
8. Make pancakes in the shape of Taj Mahal, just because it brings slight amusement to your child's face.
9. Go to "long line standing, hot as a monkey's ass, overpriced, cheesy to the point of vomit" Disney just so they can have the memories (and pictures) of happy childhood.
10. Wake up in the middle of the night worrying about your ... 40 year old "kid".
Author: Ilona Siller
