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Top 10 Reasons You Know You’re Ready To Have A Baby

Top 10 Reasons You Know You’re Ready To Have A Baby

1. The thought of discussing amniotic fluid at the dinner table doesn’t gross you at all. 2. Your dream jobs include short-order cook, cat herder, or professional nose-wiper. 3. You think personal space is overrated. 4. You’ve often thought that going to the bathroom would be much more fun if you had someone there with you, leaning on your knees, begging for attention. 5. You’ve got this nagging feeling that your house is just a bit too clean. 6. You find yourself singing Old MacDonald and BaaBaa Black Sheep. To yourself. When you’re alone. 7. 10 pm sounds really, really late to you. 8. You feel naked leaving the house with fewer than 3 bags. 9. Getting “dressed up” consists of taking a shower and putting on clean clothes. Or at least clothes that aren’t visibly dirty. 10. You’ve done that whole “sleep” thing and decided it’s just not for...

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Flouting Tradition: A Single Woman’s Road To Motherhood

Flouting Tradition: A Single Woman’s Road To Motherhood

When I saw the two storks plodding awkwardly through the marsh grass, I knew it was a good sign.  Compounded with a prediction by my friend Lillianna’s psychic that my IVF would be a success, I was beginning to feel optimistic about the costly procedure I was embarking upon. I was 39 years-old. I had spent what seemed like a fortune on fertility treatments which included seven intrauterine inseminations and a miscarriage. Like many women my age who wanted children, I was on the fertility roller coaster trying desperately to become a mother…but unlike most other women, I was getting on the roller coaster ride without a partner. Having a baby on your own. It’s what happens when all the frogs you’ve kissed have warts and you begin to accept the fact that maybe you’re not going to get married in this decade, or even in this lifetime, and while you’ve given up on tradition, you refuse to give up on becoming a mother because being a mother is what you’ve always wanted, and your life without children seems meaningless. That was me. I was a party girl with a barren refrigerator, a closet full of impractical shoes and a convertible. My life was empty. Making the decision to become a single mother didn’t come without a lot of soul searching and the support of my family. It was a decision that was years in the making. “If I turn 35 and am still single, I’ll do it on my own,” I said. But 35 came and soon disappeared into 36. At 37, I consulted an OB-Gyn who ordered blood work and discovered that my antibodies for German measles had expired. A trip to the health department for a measles-mumps-rubella immunization gave me a three-month reprieve from moving forward because you can’t get pregnant for three months after you’re inoculated. And in that three months, I lost my nerve again. Then, when I was 38, my father, who was getting a divorce, moved in with me. “Jenny, you need to have a baby. When everything else falls apart, you still have your children,” he said. As fate would have it, the day after he said this was my one-year anniversary with the OB-Gyn. “Do you still want to have a baby,” she asked. “Yes,” I said. “You need to make some decisions quickly,” she said. “Time is not on...

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Try Not To Blink

We walked past a few pretty flowers today. My nearly two-year-old daughter gleefully determined the size, shape and color of this floral display. I smiled in amazement of how quickly she’d developed this perception from just a month ago. The visual connections were evident to her before but now she could verbalize them. This captivation with nature quickly gave way to a desire to run. Her curly blonde hair bounced in tandem with a playful gallop. My daughter’s passage from baby to toddler had arrived. Being a parent, one never seems to be fully prepared for the next transition in one’s child’s development. Despite the amount of experience or research one invests into parenting, a child’s growth spurt never fails to surprise. Feelings of panic and guilt arise as we fear we’ve not provided the appropriate level of time and energy to one’s children. “Where did the time go?!” And yet, after the self induced crisis mode subsides, we reconnect with our children and hopefully move forward. To a large extent, parenting can be described as an evolving work in progress. We’ve just scratched the surface on the vast potential of humanity. Trying to shape and harness such complex beings should be overwhelming. Template parenting does not work due to the simple fact that each child is different. Tighten your grasp on a child’s development and risk stifling creativity. Loosen your approach and inadvertently open the door to intangible corruptive influences. Yes ladies and gentlemen, raising children’s a tough gig. Yet today was a beautiful day. I was conscious to soak it all in. I know there will be surprises ahead. My wife and I will prepare as best we can. Our kids will frustrate us, baffle us, and bring us priceless joy. We’re embarked on the biggest, most enduring journey of our lives. Might as well try to enjoy the ride. Author: Vincent...

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Top 10 Things That Are Wrong With This Picture

Top 10 Things That Are Wrong With This Picture

1. The parents look very well rested. 2. It looks they just woke up and the picture deceitfully has that mid-morning, 11am glow to it. 3. he father is still in the picture. 4. Looking at the mother’s stomach, the newborn triplets are obviously adopted. 5. The picture would make a great Clorox ad. 6. The mother’s boobs are not two gigantic balloons, covered in milk stains and weird round mini-pads and/or cabbage leaves. 7. The parents do not appear to be yelling at each other. 8. The mother has perfectly swept up bangs and overall clean hair. 9. It looks like they might of had sex in the last two months, judging by the glow. 10. No one in the photograph is crying, including the kids. Author: Ilona...

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Michele

Michele started writing at age eight with poems about her dolls, toys and everything little girls are made of. By fifth grade she was writing short stories. Writing has always been a part of her life continuing into adulthood with the completion of her first novel Cursed and her children’s books Munson Goes for a Walk and The Tiny Fairy House. Today, Michele works as a Freelance writer. Along with her blog she is in the process of completing her first book of poetry. She lives in New Jersey with her husband and her menagerie of...

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